Well, Stranger Things Have Come To Be
by wowsugarpuss
Summary: What if Jim really did have telekinesis. AU, clearly.


It's 9.47am when the coat stand tips up and falls over onto its side. Jim looks quickly over his shoulder to where Dwight has fallen out of his seat and recovered himself with a complex martial arts roll. Dwight jumps up, hands out to the side to steady himself against any further threat, checking that everything else in the room is still upright and he's not going to have to implement Earthquake evacuation procedure two.

Jim leans back in his chair and asks what Earthquake evacuation procedure one is but Dwight just scoffs and ignores him.

Once everything has settled down, Jim looks up to Pam and winks. He would have never thought to have the umbrella ready again. She just lifts an eyebrow at him curiously, never giving up the game.

Jim shrugs, goes back to staring into space.

* * *

At 10.03am Dwight leans over his desk and a bobble head smacks him in the face. Jim watches in disbelief as Dwight squints at the offending object. He looks up at Pam who's biting her lip to keep from laughing.

Jim checks for tooth floss, magnets anything that could be responsible for the prank. It's funny though, he'd just been thinking about setting up something like that at lunch.

* * *

By 11am Jim knows _something_ is up. There's no way that so many things are going his way without something supernatural being in the air. So far this morning Dwight has:

- fallen out of his chair  
- smacked himself in the face with a bobble head  
- stapled his own tie to an order form  
- lost his pen three times only to find it on the floor by the copier  
- sworn the clock on the wall behind Pam was moving to the right

It's just little things, but it saves Jim a lot of time torturing Dwight. With his free time, Jim opens up a game of solitaire and waits for Pam to get back from picking up her lunch so that he can relay the good news.

* * *

"It's like I think something… and then something awful happens to Dwight."

"Maybe you really do have mind control powers."

Jim lifts his eyebrows at her and tries not to smile too much. "Mind control?"

"Sure, why not?"

He waves a hand in front of her face. "Beesley, you okay in there?"

"Seriously, why else does stuff keep moving around?"

Jim shakes his head at her and Pam sighs loudly, flopping back down into her desk chair. He looks over and sees that she's half way through a game of Hearts, next to it MS Paint is open and she's been doodling with the mouse pointer.

When it becomes clear she's in a huff and ignoring him Jim saunters back to his own desk and spins the chair a little. He waits for the phone to ring. He flicks some paperclips at Dwight when he's not looking. Nothing weird happens though and the phone still hasn't rung by 1.17pm.

Leaning back in his chair Jim eventually decides, what the hell, and stares very hard at the neatly arranged stationary on Dwight's desk while Dwight is in the conference room filing a complaint with Toby for Jim's permanent record in New York (Dwight didn't like the way Jim was staring at him).

It's just a little twitch but all of a sudden one of the pens moves. Jim sits up straight, looking around for anything that could have caused the movement. It seems a little late in the game for Dwight to start getting his own back with the pranks but who knows.

Everyone else seems to be staring at their computer screens, which is strange enough. Jim looks back to the pen and squints. Slowly but surely it edges across the desk towards him.

When the pen is finally in his hand, Jim tilts his head assessing and lifts an eyebrow. The rest of the day isn't going to be so boring. Just at that moment Dwight come back to his desk and snatches the pen out of Jim's hand.

"Don't touch that. I knew you were moving them. I'm on to you, Halpert."

"Whatever you say, Dwight."

"Toby! There is a threatening nature in this workplace, as human resources it's your job to remove it!"

Toby spares a quick glance from his desk.

"Jim threatened me," Dwight clarified.

"Dwight, I just said 'whatever'."

"But it was your _tone_."

"Whatever."

"See, there it is again. I will not work next to him anymore."

It was at this point Jim decided to use his new-found skill to tip Dwight's seat backwards and send him sprawling across the floor. Recovering himself yet again, Dwight sat back down, deliberately shifting his chair half a foot further away from Jim while glaring suspiciously over his in/outbox which he moved between them for protection.

* * *

2.23pm rolls around and for the last hour Dwight has been feeling his own ass to check if he broke his tail bone. When Jim turns to him and says, "I don't think that's work appropriate behavior, Dwight. I might have to go see Toby, it's making me really uncomfortable," Dwight isn't happy.

"It's a very important part of the anatomy, Jim," he glares. "It could affect my ability to sit and that would negatively affect my job performance. I need to know promptly if any damage has occurred so that my chances of further promotion from Assistant Regional Manager are not destroyed in the future."

"Assistant _to_ the Regional Manager," Jim corrects.

"Assistant Regional _Manager_, they are very different balances of power," Dwight fumes.

With Dwight red in the face and still touching his own ass every ten minutes as if on cue, Jim decides to Google telekinesis.

The first site he finds talks a lot about his 'Chi' and abbreviates everything into acronyms. Jim clicks away pretty quickly. The next three sites he clicks on at random all talk about spoon bending but Jim's almost certain that Dwight wouldn't touch any of the cutlery in the break room without disinfecting it first anyway, so bent spoons isn't exactly going to help his cause. The phrase 'paranormal phenomenon' is thrown about a lot though and Jim idly wonders if him being a phenomenon is something Pam would be into. It's worth looking into.

* * *

By 3.01pm Jim is leaning over reception trying to get Pam's attention with a whisper.

"Hey."

She looks up. "Hi."

"So, I think I might actually have paranormal powers."

Pam doesn't look impressed. "You don't need to make fun of me."

"No, no, like I think it's actually true."

Pam turns away to shred a pile of paper that looks suspiciously blank and Jim stares at her back for a moment before heading back to his desk. Somehow he doesn't think that being a phenomenon is going to make a big difference when it comes to Pam.


End file.
